


The Ordeal

by flonnebonne



Category: Final Fantasy IV
Genre: Gameplay Mechanics, Gen, silliness
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-07-03
Updated: 2017-07-03
Packaged: 2018-11-23 02:05:38
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 526
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11393109
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/flonnebonne/pseuds/flonnebonne
Summary: A very silly story about what could happen if you overuse the "Peninsula of Power Levelling" north of Mt. Ordeals.





	The Ordeal

**Author's Note:**

> A [Peninsula of Power Levelling](http://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/Main/PeninsulaOfPowerLeveling) is one of those spots where you encounter monsters too strong for the general area. You fight there for a while and you'll level up real quick! In FFIV, you can find one of these peninsulas [north of Mt. Ordeals](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FLObtmzGpAY).

Palom: Man this climbing Mt. Ordeals things sure is an ordeal...ha ha, get it?

Porom: Don't make me give you brain damage (again), brother.

Cecil: Hey look, it's Tellah!

(It is indeed Tellah.)

Porom: Wow! Sage Tellah!

Tellah: Blah blah blah I will get revenge on Golbez when I learn Meteo!

Palom: Oh, I learned that spell at like level 50. That was a long time ago.

Tellah: Impossible.

Palom: Really? (Casts Meteo on some hapless zombies.)

Tellah: ...What is this? A child who knows the legendary Meteo...! How can this be?

Cecil: We did some power leveling on a peninsula north of here. Got a hot tip about some strong monsters up there. Excuse me, I have to kill this zombie. (Kills this zombie.)

Porom: Yes, we spent _a lot_ of time on that peninsula. My brother has been insufferable ever since. Oops, one more. (Casts White on a zombie.)

Tellah: ...I know some strong spells too! (Uses Recall and accidentally casts Toad on himself.) Ribbit!

Palom: Yeah we'll take over things from here 'kay thanks.

\- 0 - 0 -

Scarmiglione: Hisssssss.

Palom: Boom chicka Flare!

Scarmiglione: Hissssssssssssssssssss! I'm back!

Porom: Cure4! White! Life2!

Scarmiglione: ...Curse you small children! (Falls off bridge.)

Cecil: Well that was refreshing. I could get used to sitting back and doing nothing! Isn't retirement great, Tellah?

Tellah: ...

\- 0 - 0 -

Cecil: I have...defeated my dark side!

Palom: Woooot! Cecil, you da man, man!

Porom: ...I think you weren't supposed to attack it? There was a voice saying not to attack it.

Tellah: Yes, the true way of the Paladin is to defend, not to kill.

Cecil: Oh. Is that what the voice in the sky meant when it said "You must not fight now?"

Tellah: Yes! Obviously!

Cecil: But...I still won, sooooo.

Palom: Yeah whatevs, that was rad, man.

Tellah: Grumble grumble stupid level 99 folks blasting their way through everything.

Cecil: ...! Wait...!

Palom: Uh on. Two ellipses + exclamation marks...!

Cecil: I...I think I'm Level 1 again!

Palom: (Pokes Cecil, who falls over.) Uh oh. Dude.

Porom: Oh dear.

Tellah: (A look of unadulterated Schadenfreudian glee spreads like peanut butter across his face.) So these are the vaunted powers of the legendary paladin!

Cecil: !)#&!?' "%! What is the new ability I got? Cover? What happened to my !`#%#& evil blasty thing?

Porom: (Covers ears.) Eeee, that's not very holy language.

Palom: Aw, it's not so bad, bro! We can have fun powering you up again. At least your stats don't go down when you level up, unlike the elderly.

Tellah: Shut up.

(Cecil is too busy weeping to respond.)

Porom: Cecil, Palom's right for once! I'm sure we'll have a great time fighting our way down the mountain.

Tellah: Yes, I want to try out my old spells! I suddenly remember how to use them all again. And Meteo!

Palom: Cool, we can blast our way through everything! Right, Cecil?

Cecil: (Sniffling.) I guess so...

(They get into their first fight and Cecil discovers all his expensive armour has been replaced with a crappy Cloth shirt.)

Cecil: ...I want to be evil again.

Tellah: Heh heh heh heh heh.

The end.

**Author's Note:**

> I'm only posting new fics on A03. All my old stuff can be found at [my ff.net account](https://www.fanfiction.net/u/147987/Laziness-Incarnate) or [my dreamwidth account](http://flonnebonne.dreamwidth.org/tag/)


End file.
